Is Anger "Spiritual?"

We have all heard it, “You are a Spiritual person, you do Yoga, meditate and pray right? Then why do you get angry? Why you get angry with me? Why you show your anger with me?”  Maybe you have not; however, I have heard this myself.  For me, I have even heard the comparison (because I am an Animal Chaplain, a Humane Minister, ‘a holy person.’) “You say your a minister, a holy person, but Jesus never got angry…” Really? Yes,  Jesus and other holy people got and get angry and showed it. I get angry, raise my voice, and even ‘get depressed,’  I’ll give you an example, a story of my own.

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I am in India, three of the 5 times I went as a consultant for several Animal Ashrams. An Ashram is defined as ‘a hermitage, monastic community, or other place of religious retreat.’ These were Ashrams for Animals, where the Animals are considered part of the Divine. I am asked to help them organize the hospitality of the Animals, to define jobs, to ‘get good schedule’ for the Animals, to oversee these jobs and schedule and to get the Animal care ‘to more compassionate standards’ and ‘help us get more orderly.’ So I do, I watch what is taking place, make suggestions, and am told to instill or oversee them.

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When I first arrived in India, admittedly I was confused, angry, and most definitely a bit of sadness. I had some judgments about how I saw the Animals being treated, I was  angry and disappointed…a controlled wrath almost. I learned quickly my anger was my own judgment, especially from seeing the overwhelming misery and having expectations about what I heard or what is considered the “spiritual capital of the world.” I learned that standards of care are relative to the environment, religious beliefs, knowledge and caste systems. This is where I also learned a deepened sense of compassion and understanding not only for what the non-human Animals were demonstrating to us, but the human Animal as well. The words, “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do,” kept resounding through my mind.

I became no longer angry with the ‘other human,’ but a sense of gratitude and compassion deepened, for both the human and non-human. Just like me, they are all wanting to be better. That first consulting experience ended, and though I learned to speak, demonstrate, and witness some changes in the Ashram, the Animals and the people; when I returned for my next Ashram’s consultation, the anger from that point became an anger I directed at myself for feeling as if I have not ‘done enough,’ spoken up loudly and clearly enough. How come this message is not broadcast everywhere?

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You see, in all my visits I spoke up for the Animals’ care, how the Animals demonstrate what is going on in the human consciousness and by using the Golden Rule that is present in all religions, cultures, and faiths. I could see how it changed lives! Not just the non-human Animals, but it began with the human Animals’ lives.

With each instruction I gave, it was taken…”Yes, mam. Will do, mam;” however, not always implemented, or fully understood. Sometimes, Animals lives were at stake, or they were ‘suffering.’ I spoke harshly the second time I had to share, and if there was a third time I had to repeat myself, it came from a ‘not so pretty place,’ or resorted to doing/demonstrating myself. My justification was the Animals cannot speak for themselves. Then, I would get angry at myself for getting angry, and several times it took me to getting depressed. Sometimes, I would spend hours, days, or even weeks feeling as if there was ‘something wrong’ with me, my spirituality. One thing is for sure, a majority of the people I have met are angels who have taught me that their goodness, their determination that they want only the best for the Animals, and they want to be educated to do better to, and how we both can be better when we are willing to communicate openly from the heart,  setting our own judgments, assumptions, expectations and ‘shoulds’ aside.

Sometimes though, communication would stop. One of the humans would stop communicating with me. I would feel like a messenger who ‘got shot.’ Well, Jesus got crucified and Jesus did get angry . Actually, there are 7 moments when Jesus acted unlike what we call “Jesus” or “God-like.”  In an article written by Rational Christianity it states:

“Is such anger wrong? To say “God is never angry” or “God should never be angry” is to say that God shouldn’t be angry when innocent people are hurt or killed, or that he shouldn’t be angry that the Holocaust took place. There are different kinds of anger, as described in the Merriam-Webster dictionary:

ANGER, IRE, RAGE, FURY, INDIGNATION, WRATH mean an intense emotional state induced by displeasure. ANGER, the most general term, names the reaction but in itself conveys nothing about intensity or justification or manifestation of the emotional state <tried to hide his anger>. IRE, more frequent in literary contexts, may suggest greater intensity than anger, often with an evident display of feeling <cheeks flushed dark with ire>. RAGE suggests loss of self-control from violence of emotion <screaming with rage>. FURY is overmastering destructive rage that can verge on madness <in her fury she accused everyone around her of betrayal>. INDIGNATION stresses righteous anger at what one considers unfair, mean, or shameful <a refusal to listen that caused general indignation>. WRATH is likely to suggest a desire or intent to revenge or punish <rose in his wrath and struck his tormentor to the floor>.

Indignation, as described above, is what could be called righteous anger – anger at wrongdoing. This is Jesus’ anger, for Jesus is angered by wrongdoing. Clearly some forms of anger (such as fury as defined above) are wrong, and this is the anger that Jesus spoke out against in Matthew 5:22 – anger that is destructive and unnecessarily demeaning.”

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So, here is another statement I heard several times, “Give us the instructions, you are holy person. Let us get angry with them, you be like a Mother Teresa who never got angry…you just pray and give the instructions” Well, did she get angry? Yes, she did. And it is also noted she spent many years conquering her darkness.

As I read her story, even watched her movie, I can feel relate to her feelings, and this whole experience has brought me to a deeper awareness of myself, to what many of us who have come to an understanding of ‘letting go’ of what we believe it should be, and have faith in the “Power that be.” In other words, we ARE doing the will of our Inner God and if we have Faith in the one God that is leading us all, it is all good and as it shall be.  For who am I or any one of us to say, “What is good or bad, right or wrong.” It is these judgments and expectations that stir up our anger, rage, fury, and wrath.

So, What about the Buddha? Did the Buddha get angry? Yes, Buddha got angry, reprimanded, and even kicked a basin. Buddha’s anger was if you mistreat others, and though it was anger, it was shared constructively in a stern fashion, just as with Jesus and Mother Teresa, in a stern fashion so as to be heard.

So there is anger when we ‘do not get our way,’ our feelings are hurt, something touches our fear places, or we ‘think’ something should be different. These are ‘angers’ from our human ego. And, for myself, I will say that I felt that when I first went to India. However, when one is angry from a compassionate and empathetic place, a place from the heart while still authentically loving who they are working with, passionate about who they are working for, is it really anger? or is it more like Jesus, and Mother Teresa, an indignation and being a stern voice? However, does that make it right? Wrong? Spiritual? Non-spiritual? None of the above…it makes us compassionate humans.


So, just as St Francis…who, YES, also got angry, we all are learning to be aware of our emotions, where they are coming from, how to share our ‘indignation’ peacefully from a place within our hearts and with what calls our hearts.

I know for myself, the two most powerful emotions or feelings are gratitude and anger, and yet, at the core, they both are Love. This is the place I deepened into during that first consultation job. It grew with each consultation, and has continued to grow where I can I recognize it and transform it to a place of ‘compassionate apathy’ almost immediately. It is simple; however, it is not easy. However, the more you practice and surrender, the easier it can be.

Everything is what it is and it will be what it will be. Let your Heart lead the way.




What My Week Taught Me

Sunday, I definitely notice a shift in Napoleon…so grateful to witness, to experience how each day He is so much more lovey; and I notice now, how it is extending into longer loveys today, even laying on me every chance He gets today. I noticed the shift after returning from a wonderful Sisters’ gathering last week and taking Him to get His flea collar and putting on? Interesting.


Grateful to notice the underlying depression still lingering, and how sometimes it does grab me…….and when it does, I witness how I retreat within, and Napoleon retreats under the bed…….I am grateful today, like each day; I keep persisting. My question I find, placing on the Altar is, please bring to my clarity to this depression, as I am doing all I know to do, including ‘being with it.’


An opportunity to be of service arrives, helping clean off the mold….with a warning to not breath it in. This is the same mold I was living with in many of my rooms in India. I claim my Health and Wholeness, and for my families I love and miss in India.

I am graced, not only with Napoleon, but with Grey GosHawk coming to visit during the invocation for the night’s YogaChi. Thank you Great Spirit, as the inspiration and the Energy was such a blessing…….and to hear the second GosHawk sing out and join as YogaChi progresses.


on my normal Meditation Walk/Run with Napoleon, He points out a little Woman on my path for me to retrieve. She is Standing Tall and Strong in Her Power.

And as I pass back by the Church……the sign has changed….Hmmmm

Coming in the drive, there seems to be an overwhelming feeling of a fork in the road……and it is coming here now. The hopping back in forth will complete; however, the question of battling the depression seems to be the broken leg preventing me leaping.

So, it seems no surprise fleas are spotted on Napoleon again. He is still wanting more snuggles, longer, and stiller……and for the mirror it brings myself; Yes, I am grateful for being held, comforted, and accepting of assistance through these irritants. I am grateful He is with me, keeps me persisting, if for nothing else, His sake.

I am so grateful to keep focusing and now the first course of the Animals Spirit Connection module is complete!

I keep hearing “The Fork in the Road.”

Tuesday it is literally keep putting one foot in front of the other….. and taking a stand, or more appropriately a ride to the Food Assistance office, trusting the location I was given to go………Part of me, felt it odd to have to go to Quincy when in Tallahassee…..


I have Faith, and like the sign on a Church on the way to the office in Quincy……”P.U.S.H. Pray until something happens.”


Sure enough, It was a perfect ride, the correct office, magnificent help, sweet and easy.

I return to Napoleon for Napoleon’s Bow and super snuggles, and introduce Him to His special “come” treat! Finally I find it!


Grateful to follow my Inner Guidance and what I was reminded of from my Prayer partner…..”Do whatever it feels right and keep taking yourself to that happy place.”

So, I clear the Goddess mask, spray the camping gear,

img_2474-1 And, this evening as I am on a consult call, we share in the Truth of knowing, we are only responsible for learning, clearing and keeping our “side of the street” clear.

What others do with their side……that is between them and their Divine, as long as it is not endangering another sentient being.

Wednesday waking up in the t ent. First morning….so proud of Napilein. Ride back to Quincy; intuitional knowing to just show up, and wow that was simple! Forget the kindle and worked the gear. Keep it simple.

Thursday….grateful for a “Me” day! Turn on music and whatever comes…a naked day. Yet even went for a total uninhibited ride….complete with no hands. Even Napoleon totally relaxed and finds turtle….Two Black Havelina on walk

Friday Do Helmet, fix Dread tail, clear and look through Box

Saturday grateful to sleep in lunch and a movie “The Shack”

Kindness to All Animals


Traveling down the streets of India, one can see the numerous Animals. Even today there are many being used by the Human Animal to perform a variety of tasks; and quite frankly, this is true around the world. One of these tasks in India is using the Bulls, Horses, and even Donkeys to pull carts loaded with supplies. As an Animal Chaplain, ordained by the Emerson Theological Institute, I have had the honored privilege of traveling through India to facilitate Animal Blessing Ceremonies at numerous Animal Ashrams (Rescues/Sanctuaries).

During these travels, I have witnessed many Animal Activists/Advocates/Rescuers/Lovers  who get angry at, condemn, want arrested, or otherwise, the Human who is working some of these Animals. This is understandably so, as I admit, I have been one of them, we all have. We want, think and many times speak about….yelling at these humans, throwing stones, calling police, or any other variety of angry violence. Myself, I have noticed the angry thoughts, and I asked God, “There must be a solution that works for everyone, please show me. What is happening with all this anger and violence is just creating more anger, resistance and violence. I see how we perpetuate the destructive behaviors. We continue to create more by the very act of choosing to help the Animals.”

Then, one day, I am traveling with another Animal Organization’s Leader, Mr Lorenzo Standen of the LIFE Farm Animal Sanctuary, and we are at the Cattle feed shop. A thin Bull walks up pulling a cart with Its Owner. I point out the Bull and ask, “There needs to be a solution here. This Bull is so thin, And being made to work.” The Leader gets out, and I continue to contemplate prayerfully about a solution that provides dignity and purpose for everyone.

When Mr. Lorenzo returns, he states, “See the Bulls horns, he is an old Bull and that is part of his thinness. The man loves his Bull and is here at the feed store to feed his Bull, he is his livelihood. The Man must work for his family too.  I am grateful he is not out on the street as a beggar. He has pride to be a working man. Our organization just asked him if he is willing to surrender the Bull to us to come live in retirement at our Sanctuary and we will give him a younger, healthier Bull that is ready to work. If he is ever in need of feed, or medical care for the Bull, we will provide. However, if we go to check on Him and he is not in good condition, then we will take him back. The Man was grateful, and happy we understood him, and signed the papers. We will meet him here tomorrow for the exchange.”

My own understanding, compassion, and appreciation grew tremendously in that moment for the entire situation. The way it was resolved so peacefully, with dignity for all the Animals. As well as the way God answered this prayer. The Animals are providing a “need” for the Human, whatever that need might be. Violence and anger does not solve any problem, even if it is a violent situation. However, an understanding of what is taking place, and providing a solution for the problem that works for all the Animals (including the Human) is providing true kindness. If we look at the Human who is doing the job with the Animal as evil, then we are creating more “evil” with ourselves, and it does not matter what the Animal situation is.

Too often, we condemn a situation, and surmise before we take time to understand what is happening at all angles. I hear this many times in Animal situations. Take time to understand what the “situation” is, what the need is that has created the problem, and address it, for a solution that heals everyone. Kindness to Animals means being kind to ALL Animals, including the Human….as many times, this is where the problem began.

Rev Ahowan ICrow, RScP, OAC

What Today Taught Me

I am grateful for my awareness during my morning meditation run, in seeing how I feel much like this branch hanging onto a wire, with the new living arrangement. It has got me feeling shoved in a corner or trapped, hanging…..and there is only one thing to do.

This brings the morning events of….exactly what I had also begun feeling. The Pipe Bundle chooses to be bundled up, yet stay active.

I am gratefully blessed to follow the Guidance of complete simplicity to the honorable bare essentials ……

for a sweet, simple…….

Community Animal Blessing Pipe Bundle; Beautiful……

Everything else is rebagged if not in use. Loved the dresser; however, it is not me. Grateful to have had a second bluetooth keyboard, part of me knew it would be gifted here to one of my Hosts….and Wow, how perfect for us both. Perfect gift, and gifting for us both.

Perfect gift, perfect simplification of space, focused and aligned…..and much more open.

The Flute plays the Noon Deeksha through and into a solitary experience of just the East Direction of the YogaChi. I am so grateful for a fluid experience of a compassionate Fire literally like is a Volcano of the most fluid, warm, yet immensely engulfing Fire….almost watery…..for the entire 30-45 minutes.

I am so grateful for the next phase of my clothing first prototype. The new clothes configuration gets its next phase done….All I can say at this time….it gives “going commando” a whole new meaning.

I am so grateful for Salt Baths!! If you have not tried it yet….I highly recommend it! Take the whole box…..YES, the whole box…. pour into a bathtub with the hotest water you can handle, and soak for 20-30 minutes……….
Wednesday taught me…..Napoleon and I have taken another milestone in our relationship……or maybe it could be his way of demonstrating the effect of the open configuration, opening the energy and simplifying in my way….and what I know in Truth, it is both.

Napoleon will be starting his own journal….soon.

Today, I am grateful I heard, and listened to, “Turn on the video everyday for Noon Deeksha and whatever I guide you to do….. just record whatever happens.” Today, it was a solitary, airy, yet grounded North Direction.

Thursday taught me….through a beautiful online zoom call meeting representing Compassion for Animals, that when I got an opportunity to speak…speak it. Though I do not remember much of what I spoke, I do know that I faithfully pray myself in, turning myself over to Presence, for It knows what is perfect to be shared. I have faith in that.

What I have noticed afterwards, is all the ‘mind chatter’ afterwards of  “I could have said this or that.” I am grateful I am aware and stay witness to them passing by.

As I work with the gift from the Ocean again…………..

and the gifts of all the others represent…..which feel like pieces of a puzzle. When you put them together…..Hmmmm. From pieces to One.

So my piece today is almost complete….the 365 Animal Gratitude Book! Oh my, does it feel good! It was an absolute treat to go through all writings and pictures, fall in love and gratitude with where, who, and what all I have experienced….and experience the gratitude all over again….it is like a double-dose!

I am grateful to see the Eagle soar through at the completion of YogaChi….and hear the KingFisher rattle….a solitary dose of the South.

I am honored to serve one of my Hosts on Saturday…….as we drive and discuss, we attract beautiful displays of Crows, and a young Eagle standing tall on a Tree.

I am grateful to learn the actual ‘name’ of the gift from the Ocean….Whelk

I hear another book being put together….and which one is next to get ready.

I am so grateful for this day of serving….and how beautiful Napoleon “Blaze” did for our (his) day in a Mystic Arts Fair type of setting.

“There is a Divine plan for my Life, for me…. It is both personal and all around me, it is singular and collective, it serves and prospers both myself and others and I am living it here and now.” ICrow

Going to India; need help funding!


After traveling all 50 states, sharing our Oneness with all the Animals. I went to India to deepen my own Spirituality! I was amazed at how in a country renowned at their spirituality there could be a need for someone to share blessings, the Love of Spirit. Being there and blessing the Animals, sharing with the Children and demonstrating how compassion broadens our hearts and brings joy to the Souls, deepened my own Gratitude for Life! I have brought this back and shared it amongst the States that we have travelled back to. I will continue to do this upon my return. I know that what happens here, ripples out to the Universe, and what happens there ripples back to here. We are Oneness, and if there is suffering anywhere, it effects us all.
I am going back as my heart has called me to deepen in a 28 day silent process at a Oneness Ashram. It is after that I will spend 6 weeks at an Large Animal Ashram that mainly been set up for Cows in just the past two years. I will also spend time at a Dog Ashram that is mainly set up as a trap, neuter, release program similar to our Cat programs here in the US. This as my specialty in the Rescue work I did for 18 years. I am grateful for the opportunity to bring my two world together now! In addition to the two Animal Ashram I will be spending time in an Indian Medium School volunteering to share American stories, and of course I will talk about our Oneness with the Animals!!
Please help me help them! I know that everyone has it in their heart to volunteer and not everyone get the opportunity to go. It is through me that you can go, and I can share my experiences with you! Every little bit is extremely helpful!!
Thank you and please enjoy the holidays as I travel to be of service!!